The 7 Deadly Sins That Will Tempt You into Buying the New iPad

Because You Deserve It

The oldest trick in the book – you’ve worked hard, you deserve it.

You have worked hard yes, but ‘working hard’ is being quantified in this instance by yourself. Before that there was a prolonged period where you didn’t work hard at all. Peaks and troughs. You have worked hard for as long as necessary for you to convince yourself that you deserve a treat. Well done you.

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Your Life Will Be Better

With this iPad, you can do the work of many devices – more than the iPad 2, because now you can shoot HD video. You’ve been meaning to shoot some video for a while but obviously you wouldn’t capture anything in less than HD quality. You won’t even poke 720p with a stick.

Because It Is Future Proof

The sooner you buy an iPad, the longer you will have until they release a new one. You know that your iPad will continue to function long after the next one is released but it feels like better value for money to buy now as you’re paying for the newest technology. The sensible option would be to save up and buy one when you could actually afford it.

But you don’t want to miss that fuzzy warm new toy feeling. Similarly, half the point of buying a brand new car is for that weird plastic smell right?

You Old Battery Is Dying

Your battery in your old iPad doesn’t seem to last as long anymore, it’s probably nearing the end of its life cycle. What if you were to need Google Maps in an emergency and it ran out of juice. You cannot take that risk, it’s never happened before (not even close) but you never know.

Because You Are A Cunning Trader

The longer you leave your old iPad, the less it’s going to be worth, the value is going down overnight, even as you sleep. It will probably be worth pennies in the morning, there - listed on eBay, don’t you feel better. Beating the system is for winners.

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Cosmetic Damage

It’s imperfect. That scuff is hardly visible, but that’s not the point – You know it’s there and it annoys you every moment of every waking day. This is a pinnacle of human engineering achievement and it’s blemished forever. It must go.

Someone Needy Can Have Your Old One

Then there comes the fake generosity plea; managing to convince yourself that you are committing a selfless act, by offering your beloved iPad to your dearest mother, father or other family member.

This requires two levels of psychological deception; this is the inception of self reasoning, lies within lies.

Firstly you must convince yourself that the iPad is your most prized possession so that you may feel the true gift of giving when you part company.

Secondly you must allow yourself to temporarily forget the reason you actually want to get rid of it – to get the new one. Now it’s gone. What a nice guy, in fact I think that you deserve...(see point 1)

Dan Izzard gives his unjustly inflated ego a much needed outlet in his technology blogs. He writes for about consumer technology, ecommerce software and advances in ecommerce web development.

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